RESIDENT EVIL: THE AMAZING RACE
by Beretta 92FS
Summary: Leg Two has begun! The whacky hijinx of the RE crew get ready to migrate to London, England! R&R!
1. Leg One Part One

Strap yourself in ladies and gentlemen, for the most explosive reality/competition TV show ever to hit your modem! Join the cast of Resident Evil as they work together and against each other this fall on the series premiere of:  
  
RESIDENT EVIL: THE AMAZING RACE!  
  
Together, they will form alliances, grudges, and overall distaste for each other as they scramble across six continents and numerous Umbrella facilities as they try not to be the last team to hit the pit stop! In the end, only one team of two will walk out with the million dollar prize! Now let's meet our contestants!  
  
Jill Valentine  
  
Chris Redfield  
  
Dating Couple/Co-Workers  
  
Both of these two are members of Raccoon City USA's elite S.T.A.R.S. unit, and quite the couple after hours! They hope that their charisma, brains, and lasting sex appeal will win them more money then they'll ever make in a lifetime!  
  
Claire Redfield  
  
Leon Scott Kennedy  
  
Long-Distance Dating  
  
The two of them met in the Raccoon City incident, and since them have spent, in their words, 'Far too much time away from each other', and entered in the race to spend some quality time with each other, and for Miss Redfield to upstage her brother!  
  
Albert Wesker  
  
William Birkin  
  
Co-Workers  
  
One's a genetic freak, the other's a scientist! With Wesker working the brawn, and with the creator of the G-Virus as the brains of the operation, they see no excuse as to why they can't win!  
  
Ada Wong  
  
Ben Buctolini  
  
Friends  
  
Despite the fact both of them are either dead/in limbo until Resident Evil 4, they both have teamed up to win over the contest with their attitudes, natural flair, and the undying urge to find the truth!  
  
Alfred Ashford  
  
Alexia Ashford  
  
Siblings/Stockholders in Umbrella Inc.  
  
Already multi-millionaires due to their allegiance to the Umbrella Corporation, they're not in it for the money - But to prove to the other contestants that hands down, Umbrella always comes out on top!  
  
Steve Burnside  
  
Brad Vickers  
  
Genetic Experiments  
  
Also genetic freaks like Albert Wesker, will their newfound powers (And a testosterone injection for Steve) help them overcome their natural fears and defeat the ones they both hate, and love?  
  
Barry Burton  
  
Brian Irons  
  
Weight-Watchers  
  
The slightly overweight are good people too, and the two of them have joined forces to overthrow those with physiques different from them, vowing to stop Chris and Jill at any cost!  
  
Rebecca Chambers  
  
Billy Cohen  
  
Former Partners  
  
One's a spunky 18-year old medic, the other's a hardened criminal, put on the show to entertain and, should the two of them win, cancel out Billy Cohen's death penalty! Ms. Chambers continues to insist that he's innocent, and claims she will always be by his side!  
  
Ark Thompson  
  
Bruce McGyvan  
  
Sharpshooters  
  
Both of them stars of the Capcom GUN SURVIVOR series, with their cunning aim and undying courage, they'll shoot past the competition, no matter what odds are stacked up against them!  
  
Carlos Oliviera  
  
Rodrigo Juan Raval  
  
Minority Group  
  
Both out of towners when it comes to being American, they have banded together to prove to their American counterparts that other countries can come out on top!  
  
Mikhail Victor  
  
Annette Birkin  
  
Scientist/Patient  
  
The wife of William Birkin, Annette has joined forces with Mikhail Victor of the UBCS. With both of them intent on accomplishing their objectives with no concern whatsoever to their own well being, they will be a force to be reckoned with!  
  
Nikolai Zinoviev  
  
Sherry Birkin  
  
Outcasts  
  
Two loners and thought by many to be the underdogs of this contest, both their superior intelligence and undying determination may usurp the other contestants when they aren't paying attention!  
  
@MUSIC - RESIDENT EVIL 2 - YOUR MISSION@  
  
[Beretta] Here we are, on location just outside the rebuilt Raccoon City in Pennsylvania, for the beginning of this monumental contest! All 24 contestants are lined up and ready to go on the adventure of a lifetime!  
  
-Camera shows all 24 characters, lined up behind a white line in the middle of a desert, carrying backpacks-  
  
[Beretta] Now the intructions for the first leg of the journey are simple! After a 100 meter sprint, the contestants will arrive in a parking lot on the outskirts of Raccoon, where they will find twelve automobiles. The keys are already in the ignition, so it is essential to get there as fast as you can, as the good cars are first come, first serve! Their first goal is to get to the Raccoon City International Airport on the other side of town, as fast as they can! Now.on your mark.get set..-Fires .22- GO!  
  
-Nobody moves-  
  
[Beretta] ..  
  
[Steve] So by go, you mean 'Go'?  
  
[Beretta] Uh, being, commence, start moving... theoretically you have been racing for about forty seconds now, and so far the Ashfords are in first place because they each have a foot over the line illegally.  
  
-All stare at each other, then take off running-  
  
@MUSIC - MORTAL KOMBAT - TECHNO SYNDROME (The Main Theme)@  
  
-Being BOWs, Wesker and Steve's teams dash into the head of the pack, while the other teams continue to give chase, with Barry and Irons taking up the rear-  
  
[Irons] Too.much.weight!  
  
[Barry] Shut up and run, or I'll make you into a sandwich!  
  
-Wesker and Steve's teams arrive first, and a fight ensures regarding which team gets to take what car. Eventually, they all arrive, as they pile into various cars and take off like bats out of hell-  
  
CARS:  
  
Black Humvee - Albert Wesker/William Birkin Aston Martin V12 - Steve Burnside/Brad Vickers Ferarri GTO - Ark Thompson/Bruce McGyvan '56 Chevy - Jill Valentine/Chris Redfield Disused RPD Cruiser - Carlos Oliviera/Rodrigo Juan Raval BMW Motorbike - Claire Redfield/Leon S. Kennedy Volkswagon Jetta - Alfred Ashford/Alexia Ashford Ford Crown Victoria - Annette Birkin/Mikhail Victor Dodge Caravan - Ada Wong/Ben Buctolini GMC Jimmy - Rebecca Chambers/Billy Cohen Volvo 750 - Nikolai Zinoviev/Sherry Birkin Ford Escort - Barry Burton/Brian Irons  
  
-Helicopter view of contestants on main highway-  
  
[Black Humvee] -Rams Aston Martin-  
  
[Steve] HEY! -Lowers speed to let Wesker pass-  
  
[Bruce] SO LONG, SUCKERS! -Hits Nitro-  
  
[Beretta] -While they race- Their goal is to reach the Raccoon City International Airport as quickly as they can. There are three planes departing the airport for their next destination, Halifax, Nova Scotia, and only four teams may board one plane. One leaves at Noon on the dot, direct for Halifax. Another leaves ten minutes later, but the teams on that plane will have to take a connecting flight from Frederecton, New Brunswick. And the final flight leaves an hour behind the first one. Even though it is a Concord jet, getting on the first flight is still crucial at this point.  
  
[Ark] -Ferarri, in the lead- What the-?  
  
-Massive backup on the highway due to road construction-  
  
[Beretta] Ah, the joys of the summer highway projects. The teams will either have to wait, try to manouver around the construction, or carve their own path through oncoming traffic!  
  
-Contestant cars are caught up in the traffic jam, scattered throughout-  
  
[Wesker] The hell with this. -Floors it-  
  
@MUSIC - COWBOY BEBOP - RUSH@  
  
[Black Humvee] -Starts to drive into oncoming traffic, forcing innocent civilians to swerve left and right-  
  
[Alfred] -In VW, dead last- Wait a minute, we don't have to put up with this, we're rich! -Puts index finger and thumb to mouth, whistles-  
  
[Umbrella Military Chopper] -Lands next to them-  
  
[The Ashfords] -Cackle/Laugh as they board the chopper, heading direct for the Airport-  
  
[Claire] Those bastards! Hold on to your lunch Leon!  
  
[BMW Motorbike] -Does pretty much the same thing as Wesker, just easier-  
  
[Construction Worker] -Changes sign to 'Slow'-  
  
[Beretta] And the rest of them are off! And it's a fight for the lead of the remaining nine cars between the Aston Martin V12 and the Fererri!  
  
[Steve] -Rams the Ferarri-  
  
[Bruce] -Starts shooting at the Aston Martin-  
  
[Brad] AAAH! -Hides in the back-  
  
[Ark] -Activates another Nitro-  
  
-Meanwhile-  
  
[Leon] -Has a deathgrip on Claire's waist- CLAIRE! SLOW DOWN!  
  
[BMW Motorbike] -Uses some very fancy driving to manouver around Wesker's Humvee-  
  
[Black Humvee] -Continues to try and ram Claire and Leon-  
  
['56 Chevy] -Flies off an overpass and lands next to the Black Humvee-  
  
[Chris] Jill, NOW!  
  
[Jill] -Tosses a flaming Molotov cocktail on top of the humvee-  
  
[William] !$#%$#  
  
[The Ashfords] -Arrive at the airport in record time, checking in for the first flight-  
  
[Alfred] -Hugs his sister- Oh Alexia, we made it!  
  
[Alexia] And honestly, I might add. -Cackles-  
  
-Back at the traffic jam-  
  
[Nikolai] This does not help our mission.  
  
[Sherry] -Opens up the Fast Forward enveloppe-  
  
[Beretta] The Fast-Forward enables a team to skip all tasks and head directly for the pit stop, located at the Canadian Forces Base in Shearwater. In order to win this leg's Fast Forward, the teams must find the worker in charge of the highway construction, and ask for the ticket from him. The winners can then head to the Air Force section of the Airport, board an F/A 18 Figher Jet, and head directly for CFB Shearwater.  
  
[Nikolai and Sherry] -Get out of their Volvo and start looking-  
  
[Black Humvee, '56 Chevy, Ferarri GTO, Aston Martin V12, BMW Motorbike] -Pull into the parking lot for the Airport-  
  
[Wesker] Go for broke! -Drives the Humvee through the wall leading to the boarding terminal-  
  
[William] Sweet! -Gets out-  
  
[BMW Motorbike] -Drives through the hole, and get out-  
  
CONFIRMED FLIGHT BOOKINGS: 1ST JET: -The Ashfords -Wesker and William -Claire and Leon -[Still Open]  
  
2ND AND 3RD: Still Available  
  
{11:55AM}  
  
[The Three Other Cars] -Park in No Parking Zones, Curbs, etc, and pile out with their belongings-  
  
-All six of them race inside, with Chris tripping Brad and Steve shooting Ark in the leg-  
  
[Jill and Chris] -Arrive at the boarding terminal, snag the last place on the first flight-  
  
[Chris] Booya! -Kisses Jill-  
  
[Ark/Bruce and Steve/Brad] -Engage in a fistfight despite the fact they've all made the 2nd flight-  
  
-Meanwhile-  
  
[Sherry] I got the ticket! I got the ticket! -Waves it around-  
  
[Nikolai] Good girl! -Picks her up and runs towards the parked Volvo-  
  
[Beretta] With the Fast-Forward in their hands, Nikolai and Sherry can now head directly for the pit stop!  
  
{12:05PM - First Jet leaves}  
  
[RPD Cruiser, Ford Crown Victoria, GMC Jimmy] -Arrive and park wherever the others didn't leave their cars-  
  
[Carlos] C'mon! We gotta make the second flight!  
  
[Rodrigo] I'm working on it you stupid Gringo!  
  
[Billy] -Stabs Mikhail in the back-  
  
[Mikhail] NYET! -Falls-  
  
CONFIRMED FLIGHT BOOKINGS: 1ST FLIGHT (Departed): -The Ashfords -Wesker and William -Claire and Leon -Jill and Chris  
  
2ND FLIGHT (Requires Xfer - Five minutes to takeoff): -Ark and Bruce -Steve and Brad -Carlos and Rodrigo -Billy and Rebecca  
  
3RD FLIGHT (Concord direct to Halifax - 55 minutes to takeoff): -Mikhail and Annette  
  
{12:15PM - Second flight leaves}  
  
-On the first flight-  
  
[Wesker] My dear Alexia, how did you manage to arrive at the airport ahead of us?  
  
[Alfred] Ooo, such manners! We don't have to divulge the secrets of the Ashford family to scum like you!  
  
[Claire] You're going down, Chris! -Sticks out tongue-  
  
[Leon] Down boy. -Pets Claire-  
  
[Jill] -Gives Claire the Loser gesture-  
  
-Meanwhile-  
  
[Dodge Caravan, Ford Escort] -Arrive finally-  
  
[Barry/Brian, Ada/Ben] -Reserve their spots on the 3rd flight and gather in the lounge, and begin to conspire-  
  
[Beretta] Seems we may already have an alliance forming!  
  
{12:36PM - 24 minutes to last flight}  
  
[Volvo 750] -Arrives at Air Force base-  
  
[Nikolai] -Plops Sherry into the F/A 18, gets himself, does vertical takeoff and hits afterburner-  
  
{1:00PM - Concord Leaves}  
  
[Beretta] What will happen next? Will the Ashfords continue to cheat their way into the pole position? Or do the underdogs have a firm grip on the million dollar prize? After commercial, we'll find out! R&R please! 


	2. Leg One Part Two

[Beretta] Previously on the Amazing Race- Despite the other teams's best efforts, the Ashfords managed to cheat their ways into the pole position, but Wesker and William are still going strong. Nicholai and Sherry managed to snag themselves the fast forward after they found themselves dead last back at the construction site. And having all arriving last at the airport, the teams of Ada and Ben, Mikhail and Annette, and Barry and Irons have all formed an alliance. Who will be the last one to reach the pit stop?  
  
{1:30PM}  
  
[F/A 18] -Lands at CFB Shearwater, just outside of Halifax-  
  
[Sherry] Ooo, what does this button do? -Presses it- AIEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeee..  
  
[Nicholai] That can't be good.  
  
-Frederecton, New Brunswick-  
  
[Bruce/Ark, Steve/Brad, Rebecca/Billy, Carlos/Rodrigo] -Quickly make their connecting flight to Halifax-  
  
{1:40PM}  
  
[1st Flight] -Arrives at Halifax International Airport-  
  
[The Ashfords, Wesker/William, Jill/Chris, Claire/Leon] -Get off, and receive a special enveloppe from Canada Customs officials labeled 'Detour'-  
  
[Beretta] A Detour is a choice between two tasks. Teams must now make their way to the Alexander Keith's Brewing house in downtown Halifax, and deliver shipments of his 'Fine Indian Pale Ale' to a variety of establishments.  
  
-Shots of The Lone Star Café, Hooters, and the Prince George Hotel are displayed.-  
  
[Beretta] The teams have two ways to go about this task: Oldschool, or Newschool. In Oldschool, teams will commandeer a horse-driven carriage to deliver a barrel of beer, but they will only have to deliver to one establishment, the Lone Star Café. In Newschool, teams will use these tricks to deliver cases of beer to all three places. The task won't be as mentally challenging, but has it's own difficulties.  
  
DETOUR: Wesker/William: Newschool The Ashfords: Oldschool Claire/Leon: Newschool Jill/Chris: Oldschool  
  
@MUSIC - AUSTIN POWERS THEME@  
  
[The Ashfords] -Hail a Taxi-  
  
[Jill and Chris] -Run like hell-  
  
[Claire and Leon] -Swipe a parked Mustang-  
  
[Wesker] -Grabs William's arm and drags him to the plant-  
  
[Leon] -Honks, driving like a maniac- AMERICAN DRIVER! OUTTA MY WAY! -Chases the Ashfords-  
  
[Alexia] Driver, step on it!  
  
[Alfred] -Pulls his Winchester out of his backpack and smashes the rear windshield, shooting at the Mustang-  
  
[Wesker] -Leaps from building to building-  
  
[William] When we stop, can we please go back and look for my lunch!?  
  
[Jill and Chris] -Draw their Berettas and run down the streets, screaming- POLICE! MOVE!  
  
[Wesker and William] -Arrive first, start piling cases into their truck-  
  
[Jill and Chris] -Arrive second, carrying a barrel into a carriage-  
  
[The Ashfords, Claire and Leon] -Arrive simultaniously-  
  
[Chris] -Pulls out the plant first- GIDDYAP! -Lashes with reigns-  
  
[Wesker] -Floors it, pulling out of the plant on his truck like a maniac-  
  
[Leon] -Speeds after Wesker-  
  
[Alfred] YA I SAY! YA! -Has his horse speed like crazy-  
  
-Meanwhile, CFB Radar Tower-  
  
[Nicholai] Where do you think she landed?  
  
[Radar Technician] I think we're picking up her signal near the metro centre, sir. Sir? Where did you go?  
  
[Siren] -Wails- INTRUDER ALERT!-  
  
[Nicholai] -Drives off the base in a Tank-  
  
{2PM}  
  
[Flight from Frederecton] -Arrives-  
  
[Bruce and Ark] -Highjack a Cadelac-  
  
[Rebecca] -Steals an Ice Cream truck and instructs Billy to get in-  
  
[Carlos and Rodrigo] -Rent a Viper from Budget Rent-A-Car-  
  
[Steve and Brad] -Hail a cab-  
  
[Wesker] -Rolls his eyes- How long is this gonna take, officer?  
  
[Mountie] Reckless endangerment of human life, violating 87 traffic codes...  
  
[Wesker] -Hits the gas, zooming off-  
  
[Claire] -Waiting outside Hooters in the truck- What's taking him so long?  
  
[Leon] -Two chicks with their arms all over him- So you two are Canadian, huh?  
  
[Alfred] Alexia darling, can you get the map?  
  
[Alexia] Ok. -Checks map- Two more blocks!  
  
[Jill] -Reads off directions for Chris-  
  
[The Ashford's carriage] -Goes through an intersection-  
  
[Nicholai's Tank] -Flies through the intersection, flattening their Carriage-  
  
[The Ashfords] -Blink numerous times, then strap the barrel to their horse, and get on, flying off full force-  
  
[Chris] -Speeds up-  
  
{2:23PM}  
  
[Concord Jet] -Arrives-  
  
[Ada] LET'S MOVE IT! -All pile into one big van-  
  
[Big Van] -Takes off like a bat outta hell-  
  
[Nicholai's Tank] -Slams into said Big Van, crashing it and making some really big accident or something-  
  
[Random Bystander] -Dials 911-  
  
-Meanwhile-  
  
DETOUR: Bruce and Ark: Oldschool Rebecca and Billy: Oldschool Carlos and Rodrigo: Newschool Steve and Brad: Yet to arrive  
  
[Carlos and Rodrigo] -Make their 1st delivery to the Lone Star Café, pick up a few drinks for themselves while they're at it-  
  
@MUSIC - Cowboy Bebop - Go Go Cactus Man@  
  
[Ark] -Drives their carriage-  
  
[Bruce] -Open fires on any car that gets in their way-  
  
[Rebecca] -Puts on her cowgirl clothes and rides with Billy- Yehaw! ^.^  
  
-Meanwhile, Steve and Brad's Taxi-  
  
[Steve] Ya mind hurrying this up, 'Eh'? -Laughs-  
  
[Cabbie] -Just drives, makes a turn-  
  
[Brad] What's the holdup all 'Aboot', you hoser? -Laughs harder-  
  
[Cabbie] -Does nothing, speeds up through-  
  
[Steve] I got it, I got it. Where's all your whale blubber and your touques, eh?  
  
[Steve and Brad] -Burst out laughing-  
  
[Cabbie] -Suddenly jumps out of the taxi-  
  
[Steve and Brad] Huh? YAAAAAAAH!  
  
[Cab] -Flies into the Halifax Harbor-  
  
[Claire] -Finally decides to look for Leon- Leon? Le-WHAT THE HELL?  
  
[Leon] Uh-oh  
  
[Claire] -Narrows eyes-  
  
WHACKPOWSLAMCRUNCH!  
  
[Beretta] Ouch. Remember, they have free Healthcare Claire, do your worst.  
  
[Wesker's Truck] -Drives like a madman with about half of Halifax's Police Dept. after him-  
  
[William] I'll slow them down! -Shoots a fire hydrant, then tosses a jar of 10,000 instant zombies at it (Just add water!)  
  
[Ambulance with Mikhail and Annette] -Start driving into the zombies, crashing into a lamppost-  
  
[Ambulances with other two teams] -Do pretty much the same-  
  
[The Ashford's Horses] -Arrive at The Prince George Hotel, and make their 1 delivery-  
  
[Chris and Jill] -Arrive afterwards and make their delivery-  
  
[Hotel Manager] -Hands them a Route Info enveloppe-  
  
[Beretta] When teams complete their deliveries, they must then, by any means necessary get themselves to CFB Shearwater, where their next task awaits them.  
  
[Alfred] -Doubles over, in pain-  
  
[Alexia] What is it, brother?  
  
[Alfred] I haven't ridden horses in ages.Yeeeeow! -Holds crotch area-  
  
[Alexia] -T-Veronicaifies, speeding through traffic like Sonic the Hedgehog, carrying Alfred with her-  
  
[Chris and Jill] -Ride on Horseback towards the base-  
  
[Steve and Brad] HEEEELP! WE CAN'T SWIM!  
  
[Port Officials] -Throw life preservers at them-  
  
[Claire] -Drives the car towards the Prince George, their 3rd Delivery-  
  
[Leon] -Unconsious in the back, having suffered Claire's wrath-  
  
[RCMP] -Open fire on the spreading group of zombies-  
  
[The Mayor] I go on vacation, and THIS HAPPENS? I RESIGN!  
  
[Wesker] -Crashes the truck into the east wall of the Prince George Hotel, rushes the cases inside-  
  
[Ada, Ben, Mikhail, Annette, Irons] -Mauled by zombies-  
  
[Barry] -Finds himself working with the Police to kill off the zombies-  
  
@MUSIC - Final Fantasy 8 - Perdition@  
  
[Claire] -Gets the enveloppe, gets back in their truck-  
  
[Wesker] -Attempts to fix his overheating truck- STUPID CHEVY! -Kicks it-  
  
[Truck] -Flies into the air-  
  
[William] Good going, hotshot.  
  
[Nicholai's Tank] -Invades the Metro Centre, interrupting a Hockey Game, drives onto the ice, fires off, causes Chaos, etc.  
  
[Sherry] -Rushes towards Nicholai's tank-  
  
[Rebecca and Billy] -Make their delivery to Hooters, Manager stares at Rebecca in her cowgirl outfit-  
  
[Billy] Isn't she cute?  
  
[Rebecca] Billy, did you just say that?  
  
[Billy] Uh, I mean.-Grabs the Manager by the throat- SIGN THE CLIPBOARD OR I BASH YOUR SKULL IN!  
  
[Rebecca] -Giggles-  
  
[Steve and Brad] -FINALLY get out of the Halifax Harbor, and rush towards the Keith's plant-  
  
[Alexia] -Rushes towards Shearwater with Alfred in tow-  
  
[Chris and Jill] -Ride frantically on horseback-  
  
[Claire and Leon, still KOed] -Break the speed limit to catch up with them-  
  
[Wesker] -Chases after Alexia, stealing her idea-  
  
[Nicholai's Tank] -Goes offroad to get there ahead of them-  
  
[Rebecca and Billy, Bruce and Ark] -Take up the rear of those done their deliveries, still having their carriage intact-  
  
[Rebecca] Ye-Haw! -Waves around lasso, manages to snag someone's hat for Billy-  
  
[Billy] -Puts the hat on-  
  
[Beretta] -At the base, on cell phone- Mhmm.He WHAT?.Are they ok?.They won't be able to compete?.Oh dear. Ok, thank you. -Starts to think of something, then calls someone else-  
  
[Carlos and Rodrigo] -Make their 3rd delivery to the Lone Star Café, and join the race to get to the base-  
  
[Steve and Brad, still soaking wet] -Are pitied by Beretta, given a cab and are allowed to skip that event for giving him a good laugh-  
  
[Nicholai and Sherry] -Arrive 1st, check in to pitstop since they had the Fast-Forward-  
  
[Sergeant] -Salutes them- Welcome to Canadian Forces Base, Shearwater.  
  
[Beretta] Nicholai, because you caused three teams to be forcefully removed from the contest, I'm afraid I will have to disqualify you and Sherry.  
  
[Nicholai] -Yells something in Russian, then chases Sherry with a knife-  
  
[Half the Bases Troops, Pilots, etc] -Leave to combat the growing Zombie problem in Downtown-  
  
[Alexia and Alfred] -Arrive 1st, pick up their enveloppe from the box labeled 'Roadblock'-  
  
[Beretta] A Roadblock is a task that only one team member can peform. In this leg's Roadblock, teams will have to accomplish a variety of Military- related tasks. First, they will have to use these C7A1 Assault Rifles to successfully nail five different target's bullseyes. Second, they will have to grenade a stationary target, and finally, the team member must be able to successfully load an ancient weapon known as a 'Musket'. Once completed, both team members can head to the pit stop.  
  
[Alexia and Alfred] -Bicker over who should go first (They both insist the other should), then a soldier forces the rifle into Alexia's hands-  
  
[Alexia] -Starts shooting, still T-Veronicaified-  
  
[Jill and Chris] -Arrive 2nd, decide that Chris should go, being the Marksman Champion, as he joins alongside Alexia, shooting-  
  
[Wesker and Claire's teams] -Arrive 3rd and 4th. Wesker and Claire (Leon really should go to a Hospital) will perform the tasks-  
  
[Alexia] -Completes the first task, moves on to the grenading-  
  
[Chris] -Finishes after Alexia quickly, throwing the dud grenades closer to the targets than Alexia-  
  
[Claire] -Seems to do poorly, not an expert with an assault rifle-  
  
[Wesker] -Kicks ass, basically-  
  
[Rebecca and Billy, Ark and Bruce] -Arrive 5th and 6th, deciding that Ark and Billy will compete-  
  
[Alexia and Chris] -Move onto the last event-  
  
[Chris] -Looks at the rifle, laughing- You're kidding. I have to load THAT? -Gets blank stares from the soldiers- This isn't a joke? ...  
  
[Alexia] -Seems to know what she's doing-  
  
[Claire and Wesker] -Move onto the 2nd event-  
  
[Wesker] -Nails the target on his first shot, moves to 3rd-  
  
[Carlos and Rodrigo] -Arrive 7th, decide that Carlos should do it]  
  
[Ark] -Moves to 2nd event-  
  
[Billy] -Advances a second after Billy-  
  
[Alexia] -Completes loading the Musket 1st-  
  
[Beretta] After completing the Roadblock, teams must sprint half a kilometre to the pit stop on one end of the base.  
  
[Alexia] -Her T-Veronica poops out, and returns to Normal Alexia-  
  
[The Ashfords] -Take off running-  
  
[Chris] -Manages to complete the task with a little help from Jill, then they start running-  
  
[Wesker] -Accidentally breaks his Musket in half- $#!@#  
  
[The Ashfords] -Arrive at the Pit Stop-  
  
[Beretta] Alfred and Alexia, you're the First team to arrive.  
  
[Alfred] Yes! The Ashfords reign supreme once again! -Hugs Alexia-  
  
[Beretta] -Grabs his remote and fast forwards the whole event-  
  
TEAM STANDINGS:  
  
FIRST: The Ashfords - 3:49PM SECOND: Chris/Jill - 3:51PM THIRD: Bruce/Ark - 3:52PM FOURTH: Billy/Rebecca - 3:55PM FIFTH: Leon/Claire - 3:56PM SIXTH: Carlos/Rodrigo - 3:58PM SEVENTH: Wesker/William - 4:20PM (Due to Wesker breaking four Muskets) EIGHTH: Brad/Steve - 5:10PM  
  
OUT OF THE RACE: Ada/Ben Annette/Mikhail Barry/Irons Nicholai/Sherry  
  
{7PM, after the teams have all had their dinner, courtesy of the Lone Star Café}  
  
@MUSIC - Resident Evil: The Movie- Theme (By Manson)@  
  
[Beretta] As I'm sure everyone here has heard, due to.Unforeseen circumstances, four teams had to be removed from the race, which will shorten the amount of legs in the race. In order to keep the race as intact as possible, I've called in a team from the reserve list to compete.  
  
[Jill] Like who?  
  
[Beretta] -Points up to a helicopter-  
  
-A person jumps out of the chopper, activates parachute, and eventually lands on the ground-  
  
[Beretta] Everybody, say hello to Hunk!  
  
[Hunk] Your days are all numbered.  
  
[Steve] So uh.who's his partner?  
  
-A large cylinder is shoved out of the chopper, with Parachute, and hits the ground-  
  
[Everyone but Beretta and Hunk] ???  
  
-The cylinder falls apart in four peaces, causing dust to blow around. But before it can settle.-  
  
[???] S.T.A.R.S.  
  
[Chris] .You have got to be kidding me.  
  
[Nemesis] -Stands beside Hunk- S.T.A.R.S.  
  
[Brad] AAH! HE'S COME TO GET ME AGAIN! -Hides behind Steve-  
  
[Beretta] How will the new team affect the outcome of the race? Find out when the Amazing Race continues! Please review! 


	3. Leg Two Part One

[Beretta] Previously on the Amazing Race: Twelve teams of 24 Resident Evil stars departed from the starting point of the race, Raccoon City USA. The Ashfords continued to try and use their connections to gain the pole position, and managed to reach the pit stop barely ahead of the other teams. And due to unforeseen circumstances, several of the teams were knocked out of the race. Who will be the last to reach the pit stop tonight?  
  
-Shot of the pit stop in some fancy house, then shots of CFB Shearwater-  
  
[Beretta] CFB Shearwater. This was the first pit stop in a race around the world, which teams must check in for a mandatory rest period, which allows them to eat, rest, and mingle with the other teams.  
  
{FLASHBACK - TWO HOURS AGO}  
  
[General] TAKE HIM DOWN, MEN!  
  
[Tanks, Missile Launchers, Infantry, CF-18's] -Open fire on the rampaging Nemesis-  
  
[Beretta] -Takes two Tylonol- So anyway, yet another replacement has to be brought in.  
  
[Silence] .  
  
[Chris] Ok, I'll bite. Who?  
  
[Regina] Me.  
  
[All] O_o  
  
[Steve] She's not even a Resident Evil char!  
  
[Beretta] I know.  
  
[Regina] Hey you little pencil dicks, all you ever had to take on was a bunch of brain dead assholes, I HAD TO FIGHT A GODDAMN T-REX! I THINK I'M ALLOWED TO BE HERE!  
  
{3:49AM}  
  
[Beretta] The Ashfords, who checked in at 3:49 PM, will depart the base at 3: 49 AM.  
  
[Alfred] -Opens Route Info enveloppe- 'To find out where the race leads you next, travel to Pier 21 and look for the Admiral of her Majesty's Armed Forces'.  
  
[Beretta] Teams must now use any means necessary to get to Pier 21, which once served as the entry point to millions of immigrants and refugees wishing to gain entrance to Canada, which has since become a historic site. Teams must locate this man - One of the famous characters of the Alexander Keith's story, the Admiral, and receive their next destination envelope from him.  
  
[Alexia] -While saddling up on their horses- Remind me to consider building an Umbrella Facility here when this is all over.  
  
[Jill and Chris] -Get into Bruce and Ark's carriage, allied with them-  
  
@MUSIC -Ozzy Osbourne - Crazy Train@  
  
[Bruce] Giddyap! -Takes off after the Ashford Twins-  
  
[Jill] This is now officially a twin hunt! -Loads up everyone's Berettas-  
  
[Rebecca] Ooo, a pier! Doesn't that sound romantic, Billy?  
  
[Billy] Uh, sure. -Sets her down in the back of Claire and Leon's truck- And keep your head down!  
  
[Rebecca] -Clings to Billy, stays quiet  
  
[Claire and bandaged Leon] -Get into the truck, not knowing Billy and Rebecca are hitching a ride-  
  
[Carlos and Rodrigo's truck] -Departs-  
  
[Hunk and Regina] -Hijack a submarine and speed into the Harbour-  
  
[Wesker and Birkin] -Steal Nicholai's Tank and speed off-  
  
[Jill] -Looking through NVG goggles- THERE THEY ARE! -Points at the Ashfords as they catch up-  
  
[Ark] -Aims pistol- Tally ho! -Starts firing-  
  
[Alfred] -Alared- No!  
  
[The Ashfords] -Get an idea to evade the carriage-  
  
[Fishing poles holding up carots] -Dangle in front of the Ashford's horses, they speed up-  
  
[Chris] Damnit!  
  
{PIER 21}  
  
[HMCS November] -Slams into one of the ports, massive leaking-  
  
[Hunk and Regina] -Get out wearing Naval uniforms and carrying flashlights, search-  
  
[The Ashfords and co.] -Ride through the Pier 21 museum, taking a shortcut-  
  
[Museum Curator] YOU BASTARDS!  
  
[Claire and co, Carlos and Rodrigo] -Ram at each other's trucks-  
  
[Billy] -Shoots out one of Carlos's tires-  
  
[Carlos and Rodrigo's Truck] -Veers into the museum, crashes into a sea mine on display-  
  
[Explosion] BOOM!  
  
[Carlos and Rodrigo] AAAAAAAHHHHHH -Land in the harbor-  
  
[Wesker's tank] -Crashes in after them-  
  
[Regina] -Aims her Glock 35 at the Admiral- FORK THEM OVER!  
  
[Hunk] -Cuffs the poor Admiral to a lamppost, takes a Route Envelope-  
  
[Beretta] Teams must now make their way back to Halifax International Airport, and book themselves on one of three flights heading for London- Heathrow. As with before, there is only a limited amount of seating on each plane, as there is only room for three teams each. The first plane leaves at 7AM, the second one leaves an hour later, and the final plane leaves two hours after the first one, making it important to get on the first plane. Once the teams arrive, they must make their way to the fabled Austin Powers pad to receive instructions.  
  
[Regina] -Judo chops the Admiral flat out cold-  
  
[Hunk] -Tosses the rest of the Route Info envelopes into the Harbor, looks for a cab-  
  
[Claire] -Waves a hand in front of the Admiral's face- Hello?  
  
[Chris] Dude, he's KOed.  
  
[Rebecca] Then where's the route envelopes?  
  
[Billy] -Peers into the water- Don't ask.  
  
[Alexia] Too late. Where are they? -Looks with Billy-  
  
[Billy] Well, there's about one thing to do now.  
  
[Steve and Brad] -Eventually arrive, join the crowd-  
  
[Wesker] -Pulls up in a tour bus- Everyone aboard!  
  
{FIVE MINUTES LATER}  
  
@MUSIC - Baha Men - Rat Race@  
  
[The Ashfords, The Redfields, Wesker, Birkin, Leon, Jill, Rebecca, Billy, Carlos, Rodrigo, Ark, Billy] -Sit in various seats/the roof of the bus, all armed with Berettas/MP5s-  
  
[Regina] -Peeks behind them- Houston, we have a problem.  
  
[Wesker] -At the wheel- The game's afoot! TAKE THEM DOWN!  
  
[Deafening Gunfire] BANG! BANG! KAPOW! RATATATATA!  
  
[Hunk] SHIT! -Aims the turret behind them-  
  
[Bruce] I got this one! -Aims Beretta Elite at cannon opening-  
  
[Tank's Turret/Bruce's Beretta] -Fire-  
  
[Cannon Shell] -Blows up early, destroying the turret-  
  
[Regina] SHIT! SPEED UP!  
  
[Hunk] This is the vehicle's top speed! -Tries driving into a marketplace-  
  
[Alfred] Use the bumper! That's what it's for!  
  
[Wesker] -Chases, people dive out of the way-  
  
[Everyone] -Halt the chase for five minutes to pick up some fries from Bud the Spud-  
  
[Rebecca] -Poses for an ad- Bud the Spud French Fries! They're not just for breakfast anymore! ^_^  
  
-Chase resumes, music is off-  
  
[Steve] .Wesker! Turn the radio back on! I need music to shoot to!  
  
[Wesker] Alright, sheesh. -Turns the radio on-  
  
@MUSIC - B52'S - Love Shack@  
  
[Everyone Else] O_O! CHANGE THE STATION!  
  
[Steve] I like this song! LEAVE IT!  
  
[Wesker] I'M TRYING TO DRIVE! SOMEONE ELSE CHANGE IT!  
  
[Bruce] -Changes the station-  
  
[Birkin] -Beats the stuffing out of Steve-  
  
@MUSIC - Spiderman ST - Hero@  
  
[Jill] TOO DRAMATIC! CHANGE IT AGAIN!  
  
[Leon] No! THE SONG STAYS!  
  
[Chris] You trying to down talk Jill? I'LL KICK YOUR ASS!  
  
[Everyone on the Bus, minus Wesker] WHACK POW SLAM CRUNCH!  
  
[Wesker] Why can't we all just get along? -Gets punched by accident- YOU GONNA DIE, BITCH!  
  
@MUSIC - Carl Douglas - Kung Fu Fighting@  
  
[The Chase] -Moves to Downtown Halifax again-  
  
[The Bus] -Swerves around as no one's driving-  
  
[Hunk] -Grabs popcorn, watches the bus as Regina drives-  
  
[Beretta] -Passes the bus in a Mack Truck, ties the front of the bus to the back of the truck-  
  
[Everyone in the bus] -Continue to kick everyone else's ass-  
  
[The Zombie Infestation] -Invade Barrington Street-  
  
[Mack Truck, Tank, Bus] -Drive through it-  
  
[Zombies] -Climb onto the Bus, Truck-  
  
[Beretta] AAAH! -Starts shooting-  
  
[Wesker] -Tears Steve's hair off-  
  
[Steve] O.O! NO!  
  
[Jill] -Grapples with Claire- WENCH!  
  
[Claire] -Knees Jill in the gut] TRAMP!  
  
[Rebecca] -Gives Claire a haymaker to save Jill- Two cent ho!  
  
[Birkin] -Roundhouse-kicks Ark-  
  
[Brad] -Hides in the baggage hold-  
  
[Bob Marley] Here's a little song I wrote, you might want to sing it note for note, don't worry.be hap- -Gets punched off the bus-  
  
{HALIFAX INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT - 6:30AM}  
  
[Beretta] -Detaches the rope, bails from the truck and runs-  
  
[Tank] -Parks, passengers get out-  
  
[The Bus] -Overturns and rolls, throwing everyone around inside-  
  
[Regina and Hunk] -Snag the first spot on the 1st plane.  
  
[Everyone on the overturned bus] Oh my achin' everything.  
  
[Wesker] -Returns to his senses first, grabs Birkin and runs for the Airport-  
  
[Steve] MY HAIR! MY BEAUTIFUL HAIR! -Cries-  
  
[Claire] -Drags Leon to the Airport-  
  
FIRST FLIGHT (7AM): -Hunk and Regina -Wesker and Birkin -Leon and Claire  
  
[Everyone else] -Stays down, senseless-  
  
[First flight] -Departs-  
  
[Jill] -Fixes her top, pours water on Chris-  
  
[Chris] Mmmph! I'm awake!  
  
[Jill] I know. I like seeing you wet.  
  
[Chris] -Sweatdrops- C'mon, we gotta make the flight! -Runs-  
  
[Jill] -Kicks Steve in the head for good measure, then runs with Chris-  
  
[Steve] -KOed again-  
  
[Billy] -Comes to, carries Rebecca to the terminal-  
  
[Ark and Bruce] -Chase, arrive afterwards-  
  
SECOND FLIGHT (8AM): -Jill and Chris -Rebecca and Billy -Ark and Bruce  
  
LAST FLIGHT BY DEFAULT (9AM): -The Ashfords -Carlos and Rodrigo -Steve and Brad  
  
{FIRST FLIGHT}  
  
[Claire] Leon, I'm getting tired of doing all the work! YOU TAKE THE MAP! -Shoves it into Leon's hands-  
  
[Leon] Well you're the one who keeps beating me!  
  
[Claire] And I wouldn't have had to if you weren't cheating on me with those two girls!  
  
[Wesker] -Grabs the intercom- Today on the Albert Wesker Show - A police officer is accused of cheating on his girlfriend with two girls from hooters! It's an episode you don't wanna miss: "You're Mine, You Asshole!"  
  
@MUSIC - Cowboy Bebop - The Real Folk Blues@  
  
[Second Flight] -Takes off-  
  
[Carlos] We are like so screwed.  
  
[Brad] -Pats Steve on the shoulder- There there.  
  
[Steve] -Holds the remains of his hair- IT'S NOT FAIR!  
  
[Rodrigo] Wait, where did the Ashfords go?  
  
[Umbrella Concord Jet] -Takes off-  
  
[Alexia] Alright! -Hugs Alfred-  
  
{SECOND FLIGHT}  
  
[Stewardess] -Serves the three teams an above-third-class breakfast-  
  
[Jill and Chris] -Share an orange juice with two straws all romantic like-  
  
[Rebecca] -Snuggles against Billy-  
  
[Bruce and Ark] -Play against each other in the Police Trainer-  
  
[Last Flight] -Departs-  
  
[Both] -Opens up the Fast Forward envelope-  
  
[Beretta] The Fast-Forward enables a team to skip all tasks and head directly for the pit stop, but once a team uses a leg's Fast Forward, they cannot use one for the rest of the race. In this leg's Fast Forward, teams must locate Umbrella Europe at the outskirts of London, and remove the fast forward forcefully from Nemesis's hands.  
  
@MUSIC - Resident Evil 3 - Splash Intro Music@  
  
[Beretta] What will happen next to our band of heroes/villains? Tune in next week to find out! Keep those reviews coming! 


End file.
